It’s quite a coincidence that today’s TA lesson reviewed how the amygdala runs the feeling parts of your brain. The video that went with the lesson explained that the immediacy of the amygdala means the shaking and stomach churning you feel when angry or nervous is because the cortex hasn’t woken up enough to help manage your emotions.
As I sat down at my computer this afternoon, my amygdala was undoubtedly trying to awaken my cortex to an emotional situation. However, it didn’t act quickly enough because as soon as I opened my email account, my stomach started turning. It churned the same way when I first tried to figure out long division. I was nervous- just like I was back then.
Today was the day I would email my principal and the district to let them know that I am retiring effective July 1. The churning in my stomach wasn’t all nerves. It’s more a combination of excitement, disbelief, pride, and anxiety.
I typed up my short email, and let it sit there for a while. A few minutes later, team member Starr came in to grab something off the printer in my classroom.
“Can I read you my letter to Keisha?” I asked. Starr was a wise choice, she sent her retirement letter a month ago.
“Wow, that’s much better than mine,” she smiled, “I only wrote about three sentences.”
“Alright then,” I replied, “I’m hitting send.” Off my words went- into the internet. I threw my arms up and smiled. Once I hit send, the only emotion I felt was happiness. I guess my cortex woke up.
Newtreemom
ReplyDeleteCongrats on the happiness that came with making the decision and getting the letter sent… retirement is good!
Isn’t it great how once we do the thing we’re so nervous about, the anxiety subsides. At least, most of time. I take that as affirmation that I’m doing the right thing. Happy upcoming retirement.
ReplyDeleteI did not mean to comment anonymously.
ReplyDeleteThe pause and reluctance and context of amygdala kept me reading, as I wondered what the email result would be. The comparison to learning long division makes me think of how a child might feel a sense of lack of control; perhaps as you did sending in your notice. Congratulations, and enjoy these last few months!
ReplyDeleteThis is happening!
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